Farid

& they wonder why i fall sick alot

2011-07-22T08:30:00.002+08:00

woah, haven't been blogging for ages already. and honestly does anyone ever come here anymore? hello? comment at the tagboard can? haha.

anyway this is the only place i can rant. so here it goes.

all my life i've been so tolerable of my family. but things are getting out of hand recently.

so the story goes like this.

i have a big family of 4 other siblings. (although my eldest brother is married and has moved out.)
so i kind of understand that i don't have my own room. i only have a room to put my stuff in, but i'm never in there. my older brother, who shares the room with me spends the most time in it, like its all his. he sleeps in the room too.

since i don't have a room, i don't have my own bed. all my life i've been sleeping on a mattress. (yes, the ones you have to carry out and lay on the floor.) and since there's no space for a mattress in my "shared" room, i sleep in the living room.

and recently in 2011, i've been letting my mum use the matress to sleep on the living room floor. because for some unknown reason, she refuses to sleep on the same bed as my dad.

so where do i end up now? on the sofa. and its not very comfortable. the cushions are hard and it hurts my lower back when i sleep on it.

my mum. she gets very cold easily so she always turns off the ceiling fan in the living room while i'm asleep. and she always does this. i will wake up abt 2 to 3 hours into my sleep feeling hot and sweaty then i can't get back to sleep. sure, she can sleep without the fan. but i can't.

i don't understand why my mum does this to me. really i don't. to save electricity? its a frigging fan, it doesn't use alot. she's cold? she can always use a blanket. its really so effing irritating. and it has happened ALOT of times.

that's why i can't have peaceful long hours of sleep anymore. plus, i'm the type that doesn't fall asleep easily. its just hard to get back to sleep all hot & sweaty on the couch.

k, so this is the main point of my rant.

recently i've been falling sick alot from lack of sleep. fever, headache.. you name it.. my mum just brushes off the fact that i lack sleep and says that i'm weak & that i need to take supplements. wtf, right?

she has this impression of me that i'm a skinny, inactive and weak guy. but seriously, which 20 year old guy would be hyperactive at home jumping about? i'm not the cheery happy psycho type. its just my laid back style at home which she misinterpreted as me being weak. no thanks to her, i'm always sick nowadays too. but honestly, why can't she see that i exercise alot. (soccer, running, gym.. you name it.)

i just hope i enlist sooner into army. there i can have my own bed to sleep in. no worries of my body breaking down because of lack of sleep.

p.s. i'm awake now in the morning because she turned off the ceiling fan and i can't get back to sleep when i'm all sweaty from the heat.

2011-02-05T18:16:00.000+08:00

aw man, ytd night was one of the craziest nights ever.

first i went to a friend's house for cny.

den after that they went drinking at holland road.

and i followed just to lepak.

and,

the crazy part.

my friend, who drank alot, gave me a ride back home one his bike.

phew lucky nothing happened.

p.s. i didn't drink.

memories...

2010-10-14T01:16:00.000+08:00

its been a while...
a long while...
since i saw them...
since i saw her...

i keep coming back. never knowing why. still i don't know.
have i moved on. honestly yes.
then why?
maybe there's another. lurking somewhr in between the others.
another that i seek. someone to feel the void. the void that's filled with emptiness.
for who you maybe, smile and i'll smile. for that warm sincere smile could be the one that leads me to you.
even if it might not be, at least something was done other than passiveness which leads to eventual lonliness.
for even when there's hurt, joy was present first.
the joys that i seek to turn to memories to remind myself of what love is...

to the one i seek, im coming. pls wait for me...

2010-08-06T01:48:00.002+08:00

i look for you everywhere i go.. hoping to bump into you.

but i never see you. you're not there.

you're never there.

Don't Worry, Be Happy!

2010-05-29T02:34:00.002+08:00

wah farid this few weeks damn emo siolz. haha. not used to seeing myself like this.

so i will start smiling again. 'cause life's like that.

you've got to be happy. you're got to be happy other people are happy. and in turn everybody one happy family. haha shit i am crapping again. but nobody ever reads my blog, or do they? they don't seem to tag sia.. why? haha. no idea. but oh well, no readers also the blog must live on, just like my life.

its weird being sad 'cause its just not me, ya know. andddddddd walao i've been sleeping very late and waking up early for the past 3 or 4 days already. body clock is officially screwed. man oh man.. this is very bad preparation for my IPP at IBM. have to wake up early 'cause my workplace will be around Expo there.

thats really really reeeeeaaaalllyy far. but on the bright side, i get to do bullshit and get paid at the same time for 3 whole months. woo i can list down so many things i wanna buy. woo lala.. thinking of wadrobe upgrade.. need nicer clothes. lol. oh well lets just hope the food and atmosphere at work there is nice. ahhh i wll miss school so much. will miss having lunch with Xiong, Loon, Nusnus and MinMin. will miss south canteen's wedges, Koufu's nasi lemak. SIT block, the labs.. bah everything. especially the fact the i won't be able to see her anymore for 3 months in school. crap siaaaaa.. aiyah its not the end of the world haha k i am crapping again. shit. haha.

oh yeah i'm hooked on this song called Love Light by a Korean band name C.N. Blue. its really soothing with nice tunes, good sweet lyrics and a pretty good voice (which is hard to sing along to). right now its on loop in my windows media player and i will nvr get sick of the song man. i have no idea why. haha. special song?

oh yeah, thanks to my fyp teammate, WJ, i got hooked to KPOP and got sucked into the Korean world. the culture is awesome and cute and cool and all like wow man it really opened my eyes to a whole new world (or country lol). i've sorta picked up some of their language and it really nice to speak. haha but it really exercises the mouth man. haha.

ohkay enough of this Korean madness for now.

i just wanna say i'm alright now.

thanks for all your care and concern (you all know who you are?)

and uh bro banana for the chillout sessions that really cleared my mind and soul.

feel at peace now, partly because Love Light is playing through my ears now. haha.

okay i seriously have to stop crapping, stumbling, fumbling.

its time to be awesome.

2010-05-24T12:43:00.002+08:00

how could i have been so complacent?

now my heart is crushed into a million pieces.

just when i was getting all the pieces back together.

it sucks that you can break a person's heart without even knowing it.

no time to be fragile now.

its time to be cold and empty.

2010-05-19T02:53:00.001+08:00

how do you know you are ready?

when is it the right time?

i just feel so empty right now.

where are you when i need you the most? : (

i may look fine on the outside but my heart is aching so bad on the inside..

2010-05-05T01:43:00.001+08:00

when it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love..

2010-05-03T01:49:00.002+08:00

caught her twice.

& she came right beside me.

2010-04-25T17:26:00.000+08:00

Muse - Sing For Absolution

wow the weather is damn bullshit nowadays.. hot in the morning and noon, heavy rain in the afternoon towards evening.

is this a sign that the world is coming to an end?

2010-04-24T19:28:00.001+08:00

sometimes.. you know your surroundings ain't good. but why do you still hang around those people when you know they won't make you happy?

maybe this is why i prefer to be alone sometimes.. cause some ppl don't really know you, yet they talk as if they're close enough to insult you and make it seem like a joke.

maybe this explains why i only have a handful who i'm close with. i can see through ppl easily. whether they have a good heart or not.

idiots nvr fail to annoy me. but i simply ignore them nor entertain their shallow remarks. its just not worth my efforts.

some see my silence as a weakness. wrong. it is my strength. do i have to respond to stupidity? who the hell cares whatever they say or do? i know i don't.. as long as they don't cross the line.

don't ever let ppl hurt you by what they say, for you know yourself what is right and what is wrong.

know me for who i am, not for who you assume me to be.

~~~

can't wait to watch the man in the iron mask..

2010-04-09T05:39:00.001+08:00

hmmm weird dreams occur when i fall asleep from fatigue.

and i was friggin shagged after playing street soccer after fyp. so shagged that i slept at 8pm til 4am. never before so many years in my life i slept that early. i think the last time i slept that early was in pri school!!

ok. back to the weird dreams.

i dreamt that i was with the usual bunch of guys and all. we were damn bored and got nothing to do (as always). den as usual i came up with something stupid for us to do. i decided we go for the fish-eating-our-dead-skin thang.yeah i have no idea whats that called.

so anyway, we went there. and uh once we arrived this uncle ask us which fish we want. and ll went to pick the fish. so we went over to one room where there were big tubs of water.

so uh since he picked the fish, ll went into the big tub first. den the uncle poured like food into the tub for the fish and the fish started scrambling and thrashing in the water. i took a closer look den i saw that the fish had teeth like our teeth! LIKE DAMN. with the jaws and all!! scary shit. idk what happened next cause i sort of phased into another dream.

~~~~~~~~~ (phasing)

next dream. i running. i ran and ran and ran. and den i started to glide. i was wondering how i did that when i saw some guy below me catching up to me on his bike. (uh idk why hezel was there lol.) yeah he was riding his bike. trying to catch up to me. and he was like jumping damn high. his bike had some sort of huge suspensions or springs. yeah and i was already fying so high. i have no idea how the hell he could have jumped up to my height like 10m above the ground already siol.

yeah thats all folks. sorry there wasn't any ending to my dreams.

but, aren't dreams supposed to be that way?

k anyway my body clock like screwed already man. everyday, sleep at 8pm, 12midnight wake up. den cannot go back to sleep. eat, play com, den 4am sleep. 7am wake up for school. tahan until 6pm. den reach home around 7pm. den 8pm sleep. den the cycle continues.

what a sick.

k uh i guess i be going to sleep now. its like a daily routine already.

zzz.

2010-04-06T10:39:00.000+08:00

You have to take the good with the bad,

smile when you're sad,

love what you've got and remember what you had...

Always forgive but never forget,

learn from your mistakes but never regret,

people change,

things go wrong,

just remember, life goes on...

2010-03-24T03:43:00.006+08:00

beef : good for muscle growth.
potato : good for energy.
carrot : good for eyes.
tomato : good for beautiful skin

fact:

i love my mum's curry.

fact:
i love my mum's cooking.

FACT:
i love my mum.

and you ppl wonder why i'm eating at this kinda time..

seriously speaking, if any of you girls out there are able to cook as well as my mum, i will marry you. seriously, haha. so either you have skillz, learn from her or zou kai. hahaha.

"the way to a man's heart is through his stomach"

now that i think abt it, this phrase holds some truth to it.

let me break it down for you:

if you cook for a man, he will recognise the time and effort you have put in to prepare him a meal. if you feed a man, he will know how concerned you are about his state of hunger rofl. if you buy him food, he will recognise that you care for him to spend money on him.

if only all men are this appreciative eh? hahahah..

OKAY.

what the hell am i typing. its 4am already and i have FYP in a few hours time.

@#$%$#@#@$%#@&%$#

ril:

cari duit, carik pompan,

ni semua untuk mase hadapan.

2010-03-23T04:27:00.001+08:00

i need a best friend.

just someone to talk to.

life's fun that way.

2010-03-21T05:31:00.003+08:00

NACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

MUSE

Falling Away With You

I can't remember when it was good

Moments of happiness elude

Maybe i just misunderstood

All of the love we left behind

Watching the flashbacks intertwine

Memories I will never find

So I'll love whatever you become

And forget the reckless things we've done

I think our lives have just begun

And I feel my world crumbling

And i feel my world crumbling

And i feel my soul crumbling away

And falling away,

Falling away with you~

Staying awake to chase a dream

Tasting the air you're breathing in

I hope I won't forget a thing

Promise to hold you close and pray

Watching the fantasies decay

Nothing will ever stay the same

And all the love we threw away

And all the hopes we've cherished fade

Making the same mistakes again

And I feel my world crumbling

And i feel my life crumbling down

I can feel my soul crumbling away,

and falling away,

falling away with you~

All of the love we left behind

Watching the flashbacks intertwine

Memories I will never find

mean-ing [mee-ning]

-noun

1.what is intended to be, or actually is, expressed or indicated; significant; import: the three meanings of a word

2. the end, purpose, or significance of something: What is the meaning of life?

-adjective

3. intentioned (usually used in a combination): She's a well-meaning person.

4. full of significance; expressive: a meaning look.

hmm i don't know why but i like to infer things like words, songs and maybe pictures. i just like to find its deeper meaning and understand it better.

maybe its unnecessary.. but i'm just too bored all the time, so.. lol.

sometimes you will feel satisfaction when you understand what emotion is being expressed and how the artists feel when the song was written or when a picture is painted.

like the pain or suffering of an artists pleading for peace, or the joy of happiness of a person in love.

its great to feel this kind of connection because it empowers the human spirit. (i think, lol.)

emotions, they make life so much more interesting.

there is this cool movie where emotions are illegal though.

its called Equilibrium, starring Christian Bale.

its basically a science fiction movie that takes place after WWIII.

the world was so badly devastated that it could not take another world war.

so in order to prevent another war and save the human race, scientists invented a drug that suppresses human emotions.

cool eh? catch it if you're interested. :)

speaking of movies i caught a midnight movie not long ago tonight.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid.

one word to describe the night: Mooshnackles!

ZOO WEE MAMA!

2010-03-16T02:25:00.002+08:00

woo damn it after 19 years of going the clean path i finally sheesha-ed.

no biggie though since its just an experience. its a little pleasant but uh not gonna have so much of a huge impact (good nor bad).

and uh, sat night was it? was the first time in my life walking home from woodlands to sembawang. i could have lost my way sia if not for dmunk being there to lead the way. imagine me walking around aimlessly in woodlands til the sun goes up. haha that wouldn't be a nice scenario, would it?

and we encountered a huge BAMF-ing stray dog in admiralty. out of us two, it chose to go after me. -.- damn that dog. i was already damn tired have to deal with the dog. -.-

yeah well the journey from admiralty to semb was going to damn lonely so i stopped by a supermarket to get apple juice. lol.

so i staggered home like a drunkard drinking a 1litre carton of apple juice. HAHAH!

i tried calling a few numbers on my phone but they were all asleep except for cheezel who already was lazing in bed. -.-

oh well eventful sat night indeed.

and i have not completed drawing that ice milo.

i only sent you an empty cup with a straw.

HAAAHAAAA :D

2010-02-23T03:36:00.000+08:00

hi.

bye.

the beginning of an end?

the end of a beginning?

2010-01-30T00:54:00.004+08:00

i have walked down this path countless number of times..

..but i will never get bored of it.

words, they can never express enough.

2010-01-26T03:24:00.001+08:00

hmm more than a month without a post?

tsk tsk farid oh farid.. you disappoint your readers..

2009-12-15T00:03:00.001+08:00

*snap!*

from nerd to dude.

2009-12-04T01:54:00.003+08:00

Lindt Lindor.

one of the best chocolates i've ever eaten in my entire life.

2009-12-01T00:09:00.001+08:00

i hate mozzies.

i hate them even more when i'm the only person they decide to suck blood from.

2009-11-23T18:14:00.001+08:00

chen yan gave me inspiration.

2009-11-21T01:09:00.003+08:00

hmmm i've been noticing something lately..

ppl have been swinging their arm more wildly when they walk..

why? i don't know.

observe for yourself.

; )

2009-11-13T01:55:00.000+08:00

is this really me?

Farid took What is your personality type?

Type 7
The Enthusiast Type Seven is spontaneous, versatile, distractible, and scattered. Sevens have anxiety about their inner world. There are feelings of pain, loss, deprivation, and general anxiety that Sevens would like to stay clear of as much as possible. To cope with these feelings, Sevens keep their minds occupied with exciting possibilities and options— as long as they have something stimulating to anticipate, Sevens feel that they can distract themselves from their fears. Sevens, in most cases, do not stop merely at thinking about these options, however. As much as possible they attempt to actually do as many of their options as they can. Thus, Sevens can be found staying on the go, pursuing one experience after another, and keeping themselves entertained and engaged with their many ideas and activities.

2009-11-08T02:20:00.001+08:00

loneliness be over~

when will this loneliness be over~

2009-11-06T01:09:00.000+08:00

ate swordfish.

the end.

2009-11-04T01:30:00.005+08:00

you caught my eye, just when everything seemed so gloomy.

yea,

i have gotten over the pain of my blister

and i'm pleased that my visit count of my blog has gone up substantially.

hope its not only fahfah visiting and refreshing though.

haha.

well i danced with the blister anyway on monday.

supposed to be learning locking from Chunky Ian.

but he brought with him two guys from Melbourne.

brothers Nish and Sid from Down Under.

4 years apart.

famous ppl from the dance scene.

they were awesome.

it was a great experience for them to come down to NYP

and share some moves with us Fbodz.

they were very talented.

seriously impressive.

showcase was like this,

Nish was Locking, doing House and Hip-hop..

Sid was doing Krump and House and Popping..

inspiration.

and Nish started dancing 2 years back.

he's my age. dame~

well you can google them and see how successful they are.

well enough of that.

my lower back hurts from all the House.

i feel old.

2009-11-02T01:51:00.005+08:00

me with "MJ".

BB. (Big Blistah)

damn.

i got a blister the size of a thumbprint on my left toe.

my delicate toe..

now i can't walk properly.

how do i go for my weekly runs now,

or play footie on weekends,

street soccer on wed nights,

and worst of all,

how do i dance?

i just started dancing again..

can't even pray without the pain..

sigh, i'm whining and complaining too much..

alright mustn't be a wimp.

now's the time to be a man.

tchoukball tournament coming soon. (14th nov)

just hope it heals soon.

hopefully some optimism would rub off on you.

right now, got to get past the pain barrier.

barefoot = bad.

2009-10-31T00:26:00.003+08:00

i'm beginning to wonder..

is my body that tired?

today i decided to take a nap. but it turned out to be a 3hr sleep.

and i missed fbodz practice.

!@#$%^&*

i can only blame myself.

darn rain made it so comfortable to sleep..

sigh, i really wanted to learn freestyling.

and i miss the ppl there.

i can see you guys are changing;

personality and dance-wise.

it hurts.

these few days, i can feel my body tiring easily.

during the runs, the dancing..

where did my legendary stamina go to?

is it because i didn't have enough rest during the hols?

'cause i spent most of the hols stressing abt oracle exams?

damn.

well now the semester has started.

projects, assignments.

argh.

such a vicious cycle.

i'm nvr going to study in the next hols. -.-"

and uh, i've got 4 visitors since the last time i was here?

at least tag, it will encourage me to blog even more.

and if you request for pics, i will put in effort to upload some.

ha.

haha.

ha.

ho.

heh.

thanks.

2009-10-29T02:36:00.002+08:00

decisions decisions.

muscle ache, muscle ache.

shall reorganize my life soon.

dance dance, we're falling apart to half time.

2009-10-25T04:34:00.003+08:00

wow.. my weekend will go past just like *snap*, man.

been working at a Singtel & Sony Ericsson roadshow at cineleisure.

on Sat and Sun.

acting as paparazzi for an MJ impersonator.

whom, is actually a cool down-to-earth guy when i get to talk to him during breaks.

got to play with helium and balloons.

damn, it was funny.

funny haha, and funny weird.

and got to meet new friends.

cool eh.

well, will be going back there again at 12noon sunday.

approx. 7 hours later.

night, biatches.

2009-10-19T23:24:00.001+08:00

there's nowhere left to hide,
in no one to confide,

the truth runs deep inside,

and will never die..

sigh.

2009-10-12T02:18:00.008+08:00

Mon coeur s'ouvre à la voix,

Dalila's aria from Samson et Dalila

Mon coeur s'ouvre à la voix, ................... My heart opens to your voice,

comme s'ouvrent les fleurs ..................... like the flowers open

Aux baiser de l'aurore! ........................... To the kisses of the dawn!

Mais, ô mon bienaimé, ........................... But, o my beloved,

pour mieux sécher mes pleurs, ............. To dry my tears the best,

Que ta voix parle encore! ....................... Let your voice speak again!

Dis-moi qu'à Dalila ..................................Tell me that to Dalila

tu reviens pour jamais, ............................ You will return forever,

Redis à ma tendresse ............................ Repeat to my tenderness

Les serments d'autrefois, ....................... The oaths of other times,

ces serments que j'aimais! .................... the oaths that I loved!

Ah! réponds à ma tendresse! ................ Ah! respond to my tenderness!

Verse-moi, verse-moi l'ivresse! ............. Pour out to me the drunkeness!

Ainsi qu'on voit des blés ......................... Like one sees the wheat

les épis onduler ........................................ the blades undulate

Sous la brise légère, ............................... Under the light breeze,

Ainsi frémit mon coeur, ........................... So trembles my hear,

prêt à se consoler, ................................... ready to be consoled,

A ta voix qui m'est chère! ....................... by your voice which is dear to me!

La flèche est moins rapide ..................... The arrow is less quick

à porter le trépas, .................................... to carry death,

Que ne l'est ton amante .......................... Than is your love

à voler dans tes bras! .............................. to fly into my arms!

Ah! réponds à ma tendresse! ................. Ah! respond to my tenderness!

Verse-moi, verse-moi l'ivresse! .............. Pour out to me the drunkeness!

listen to Muse - I Belong To You(+Mon coeur s'ouvre à la voix) >>>>>

2009-09-30T17:38:00.003+08:00

i had a dream. about a beautiful girl. but the dream also came with complications. much like the real world.

funny.

its confirmed.

i'll always enter dreamland when i go to sleep feeling really tired.

when i doze off from fatigue, its guaranteed my mind will start to wander.

but why?

2009-09-28T17:38:00.007+08:00

played keeper last sat and sunday.

guess what? i make a decent keep. conceded one goal per game. and managed most of the defending on my own, since most of the defenders on my team are pushing up and MIA most of the time.

most of the time, its a 1 on 1 situation summore. damn kids. and sometimes i only have 1 defender with me. oh, and i ended up brushing my left knee on the rough sand, fortunately i prevented a goal heheh. well, it bled and now there's a scar. (-.- haven't injured my knee since early primary school days man.)

and bah my right boot tore. heck, it tore on the outstep. how the hell did that happen? now i can either sew it up or get a new pair. thinking.. nike T90 II, adidas F50, or predator powerswerve.

now with all this raya money, i feel so.. nice. but shall manage it properly. (think, friends.. family.. den myself.)

muse.. presents.. boots.. clothes.. shoes.. street soccer shoes.. jacket.. food..

and now here's some food for thought.

somebody told me (a few times), what for talk abt the match when its over? or, lets say in general, talk abt the past.

(and it irritates me alot.)

why?

i'll tell you why.. we need to reflect what we have done wrong. spot our mistakes, so that we can learn from it and not repeat it. my point is, its to improve ourselves.

its no wonder you're still the same. we try to live our lives, be a better person. and eventually, be happier and more at peace with ourselves. some ppl are just selfish, ya know.

on a sidenote, i don't feel like doing anything stressful during the hols. hence, haven't been going to fb. although its fun, its also stressful. and, i think i'm not trying even the slightest bit to fit in. i do get along with them but not that well. so, no peers, no fun. don't feel a sense of belonging too. sigh.

on another hand, its so complicated this life. i really wish ppl can read my mind. den maybe i don't have to waste so much effort just to share my thoughts. and probably know what i feel abt everything.

Mr T. : "I pity the fool."

2009-09-19T03:21:00.001+08:00

as the days go by, they g by oh so slow..

2009-09-04T04:04:00.009+08:00

3rd september 2009

the day i got really worried. today my dad wasn't himself..

today my dad had a bad experience. and from my perspective, it doesn't look pretty. today my dad woke up after his evening nap and started behaving strangely.

he got up and sat at the foot of the bed and start scratching his head. sometimes vigorously. his leg was shivering and it doesn't look right at all. he kept repeating "Allah hu akbar" loudly like he is in pain. i think his mental state was in a mess.

my mum kept asking him if he was ok. but he kept sshh-ing my mum. putting his finger to his lips and saying "bingit lah". and sometimes he would speak loudly, but not angrily.

i heard the commotion and went into the room. i also asked him why but he shhh-ed me too. then he got up and went to the living room to sit on the sofa. now, he rubbed his arms like he was feeling cold. once or twice he got up and shook his feet. i don't have a single clue to what was happening. he was seriously worrying me.

it was like he was feeling very agitated and hyperactive at the same time. but he knew who he was. mum checked to see if he still could recognise us, as well as himself and he did. i was trying very hard to be calm so i wouldn't worry my mum even more. but on the inside, i was shaking. disturbed and panicky.

i was waiting anxiously for the azan as i thought it would make him calm down and come to his senses. but no.

this time he sat at the dining table while the azan was playing on the radio. gah, he was still the same. and the way he spoke was like that of a hyperactive child. like really loud, eager and stuff. and on some short occasions he would break down. suddenly he would be sad and cry to himself.

well it was time to break fast. and he had to inject some insulin 'cause he's diabetic. i just stood there wondering if i should do anything. i mean, he possibly couldn't inject himself in such a state.

he had problems adding up the doses of insulin. i asked him how much was the dose and he couldn't even answer. he smacked his head repeatedly cause he couldn't count. at that point i decided. no injection today.

and to make it worse, he had already filled up his needle and i saw it was slightly above 50 when it was supposed to be 47. he even joked abt a possible overdose. "kalau overdose macam mane? game ah papa." he said.

so i persuaded him not to inject today. he finally agreed and he sprayed the insulin all over the table. so i cleaned that up with a piece of tissue.

one thing that bugged me was how many times he asked me if i loved him. and he kept hugging me and saying "farid anak papa kan..", "farid sayang papa?".

well and to illustrate how eager he sounded here's like a conversation between me and him around that time:

Papa: "Farid sayang papa tak?"
Me: "sayang.."

Papa: "Nama papa sape?"

Me: "Abdul Hamid.."
Papa: "Ab-Dul Ha-Mid Bin Mah-mood."

at this point he was emphasising his words.. why would he ask me for his own name? he was very enthu and strange.. not like my dad at all.

and since it was buka he was like "makan makan makan.." to me and my sis. but both of us are too scared to eat.

i served him some porridge. he kept eating and eating. my normal dad would have stopped for a while because he was easily full.

after eating, a while later he was sober. he was back to himself. and he doesn't even rmb some of the things he did. i'm beginning to wonder if it has something to do with his blood pressure. hmm..

the ordeal lasted for abt an hour.

for that hour,

i was so afraid.

afraid i might lose him.

afraid my dad might lose his sanity forever.

afraid that bad things will ensue.

hopefully its all okay now.

i just want it to be back to normal.

sigh.

what does Allah s.w.t have in store for us?

2009-09-02T06:10:00.011+08:00

you might ask me, why i am blogging at this hour right now.. but its just my daily routine these past few days. been sleeping at 6am everyday. partly because i go online after midnight. partly because i have to eat sahur (breakfast for fasting). and partly because i have been studying for my exams which is at 9am.

you can very well label me a vampire cause i am turning into a nocturnal creature.

-always sleeping right before sunrise. (except when i have exam that is)

-always eating in the night. (after 7pm 'cause it fasting month)

ha. ha.

-.-

well i still play footie on weekends. but i wish i could spend more time practising cause i have lost my touch recently. very rusty on the ball. very. like a n00b.

ahh well. today i was digging my cupboard, looking for my sis' hairband that i borrowed and lost.

didn't manage to find that. but what i found was much much better.

i found my old Creative Zen Micro which i haven't been using for years. it hangs when it starts and i used to think it was broken. until moments later.

i went to google the problem and got it fixed. how cool is that? and how dumb was i back then? hahah.

well now its back to normal and i'm listening to it now. first songs added in? Muse.

Currently playing : Muse - Starlight.

i mean, music is one of the simplest pleasures in the world.

and now i shall stay awake til exam's over. last paper in 3.5 hours. freedom in 5.5 hours time.

Currently reading: Object Oriented Analysis and Design.

what the crap.

2009-08-30T03:22:00.001+08:00

i think yesterday night got Lai latu Qadar. (i don't know how to spell, forgive me.)

Life = Chocolate?

2009-08-21T04:00:00.004+08:00

Life, can be sweet as chocolates,

but may turn out to be bitter sometimes.

Life, like chocolate, can have lovely surprises such as raisins and nuts.

but sometimes can have bad surprises like bitter walnut (bleah!).

At times it can go as planned.

On the other hand, things can go unplanned as well.

In chocolate terms,

It can be nice if it melts in your mouth, (planned)

however it ain't nice if it melts on your hand. (unplanned)

It can come in many varieties of flavours - dark, milk, orange etc.

Life can vary. (ALOT)

Some people make nice chocolates by carefully finding the right cocoa and cream - Ferrero Roche, Kinder Bueno etc.

and others make crap! - those brandless cheap chocs sheesh! haha

In Life terms,

Some people make their life better living by doing the right things.

the others can't be bothered so they end up with screwed up lives.

and there are many more examples i can think of - to relate chocolate with life.

but i shall leave it til next time. maybe one post at a time?

oh well.

like Forrest Gump used to say,
"My momma always said, "Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."

so,

Life = Chocolate?

2009-08-14T16:09:00.005+08:00

Muse

The Resistance

can't wait for it to be released..

---->

you know the feeling, when you quickly get up?

and when the blood doesn't rush up to your head?

well i experienced worse than that.

immediately after waking up, rushing and cycling to the mosque.

didn't even drink the tea my mum prepared.

20mins walk. i took just 5 mins to reach there on bike.

my legs were weak. and i was catching my breath.

my head was in a daze..

my eyes were 80% blacked out..

i felt like i was blind..

i could hear myself breathing deeply..

somehow my ears were clogged.

it lasted a few minutes..

i held on. knowing if i didn't, i might collapse.

it was a bad experience.

i don't ever want to feel it ever again. -.-

Cycle + Jalan Kayu = Ass Pain for 6 Guys

2009-08-11T21:35:00.005+08:00

can you hear a whisper in the wind?

i see a cloud thats shaped like a bird.

what do YOU see?

post starts here.

it was sunday night. national day.

some random guys decided to head to tj's house on bicycles, to catch the FA charity shield match.

chelsea won.

damn.

played abit of lock bend. and we left.

cycled from khatib.. to yio chu kang.. to sengkang area.. to our destination..

JALAN KAYU.

first time we went night cycling together in the wee hours of the morning.

fucking upslopes. -.- i bet ck and tj lost some pounds that fateful night.

reached JK at around 2-3am i suppose..

(i still want my Qeema Naan or Tandoori Chicken Naan..... damn it out of stock and i'm definitely ordering mutton soup the next time we go there)

yeah well the trip back was Heaven and Hell altogether.

Heaven?

downslopes. wooooooooooooooooooo~

Hell?

our asses all fcuking pain sia. from cycling about 10km there and back. (total around 20km?)

well we reached home at around 6am in the FRIGGING wee hours. lol.

and damn it ll got to keep the Opel car rim we found midway through our journey.

it shall be a momento.

to rmb this awesome crazy random night.

w, ck, tj, j, ll and f. random shitxzx.

2009-07-11T03:45:00.003+08:00

sometimes i feel like i have difficulty expressing myself..

especially if other people's feelings are taken into account.

i hide beneath this mask, afraid of the unknown.

what goes on the outside may not be whats going on in my mind.

i can relate to Chandler, behind those jokes are so much more..

somehow.

some way.

2009-06-30T02:21:00.005+08:00

whee finally i'm gonna update on the Fbodz camp. it was awesome to say the least. lotsa stuff i never imagined i would be doing happened during camp. ha ha.

first day was just basically being punished by doing push-ups and squats cause some guys were late for the camp. dang it my chest ached like mad cause its been a while since i last did push ups. and i wasn't even late! ha ha. and uh we continued the day by learning how to dance and stuff and play some games. games which involved close contact, lips and a plstic sheet.

man, did i learn a lot of dance styles and techniques during camp.

hip-hop, house, wacking, locking, popping, raggae and breaking just to name a few.

got a brief history on each style before we learnt some basic moves. you might think, man thats quite alot to remember in the space of 2 days. but hey we it wasn't that hard at all.

second day was morning pt and a 1.6km run around the track. after that was the water games. which was well okok fun cause we were in the hot sun for quite some time and uh i think most of us got sunburned. at night we sorta clubbed in one of the rooms and uh they screened Dead Silence afterwards before heading for night walk. seniors were well costumed as ghosts, zombies and some scary stuff. job well done.

my group which consisted of 2 guys and 2 gals were second last to go and it was already like 2.30am. we were supposed to follow some glow sticks around school and complete some tasks on the way.

first stop tennis court toilet. friggin shit cause its at the back of the school where its dark secluded. 2 girls supposed to go in and watch a horror clip and answer some qns asked by a senior standing outside. the toilet was total darkness and seniors hiding inside banged the cubicle walls and stuff. woo.

after that station was some lame basketball thing. and den we walked down to blk A to go up and uh pass some paper/letter thing to a guy sitting upstairs. and enter a room with a doll in one corner. had to find her missing shoes in the dark room.

moving on, we went to the next station. some toilet at blk A to find a red ping pong ball. once again the toilet is dark and you had to stick your hand under a cubicle, and seniors will pour fake blood on your hands.

after that we were supposed to run down a hallway if not we would get chased by "ghosts". and uh after that was uhhh the dance studio where zombies lurk in the studio. and inside the dance room with mirrors and uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

lazy to type already. well yeah thats some part of the night walk.. still got some good stuff happened. lol.

go mao mao zhong (is this how you spell caterpillar in Chinese?)

2009-06-25T02:51:00.003+08:00

foreign bodies camp in 8 hours time.. you guys meeting up and catching up.. you can't have everything i guess.. well you just got to have fun thats what i always say.. but in the end you got to take some things into account..

bahh i really wanna kick ball.. maybe play match.. after seeing rpwst's win against SIM today. but damn my left calf is feeling funny right now. a day after going swimming at ah boy's condo. and i think i will get a dead leg tmrw during warmup. my legs always tremble during stretching. argh shitxzxzxz. i'm not as flexible as the others there. walao eh some ballet girls there power lah.

spain playing against usa now. confed cup semi finals. its shown on RCTI. haha not even on cable la.

usa winning by one goal. cool or what? but i think spain will overcome it eventually.

oh well off to sleep > camp > dance.

can't wait to watch transformers 2 when i break camp on sat. anyone up for it??

2009-06-17T04:09:00.003+08:00

played tennis today with ch and yl. quite fun once you know how to swing the right way , and hear the solid sound of the ball hitting against the strings.

awesome.

and uh, went to ch's house to slack. and uh, he plays guitar?? O.O

and how much is his guitar worth???? O.O!!! ok crap this is starting to turn out like some manga shit with the expressions.

better stop now.

night night.

2009-06-16T01:47:00.003+08:00

went to tekong at 2pm today. send my brother off for BMT/NS.

took a fancy ferry there. awesome i love boats. i love the waves.

went around Tekong BMT training facilities.. took tour on a bus. cool.

got some aweseom pics.. but i'm plain lazy to post them.

ahhhhh..

i think i'd rather go army. hmmm.. rather nice there.. or so i think? haha.

oh well..

2009-06-14T03:29:00.003+08:00

Eminem

Beautiful

Relapse

Lately I’ve been hard to reach
I’ve been too long on my own
Everybody has a private world
Where they can be alone

Are you calling me?
Are you trying to get through?
Are you reaching out for me?
Like I’m reaching out for you.

(Verse 1)
I’m just so fucking depressed
I just can’t seem to get out of this slump
If I could just get over this hump
But I need something to pull me out this dump

I took my bruises, took my lumps
Fell down and I got right back up
But I need that spark to get psyched back up
In order for me to pick the mic back up

I don’t know how or why or when
I ended up being in the position I’m in
I’m starting to feel distant again
So I decided just to pick this pen

Up and try to make an attempt to vent
But I just can’t admit or come to grips
With the fact that I may be
Done with rap, I need a new outlet

And I know some shit so hard to swallow
But I just can’t sit back and wallow
In my own sorrow, but I know one fact
I’ll be one tough act to follow
One tough act to follow
I’ll be one tough act to follow
Here today, gone tomorrow
But you’d have to walk a thousand miles

(Chorus)
In my shoes just to see
What it’s like to be me
I’ll be you, lets trade shoes
Just to see what it be like to
Feel your pain, you’ll feel mine
We’ll go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each others eyes

Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you
Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you

(Verse 2)
I think I’m starting to lose my sense of humor, everything ‘s so tense and gloomy, I
almost feel like I gotta check the temperature in the room just as soon as
I walk in, Its like all eyes on me, so I try to avoid any eye contact
Cuz if I do that, then it opens a door for conversation, like I want that!
I’m not looking for extra attention, I just want to just like you
Blend in with the rest of the room, maybe just point me to the closest restroom
I don’t need no fucking man servant, Trying to follow me around and wipe my ass
Laugh at every single joke I crack, and half of them ain’t even funny like

“Haa! Marshall you’re so funny man
you should be a comedian god damn”

Unfortunately I am, I just hide behind the tears of a clown
So why don’t you all sit down, listen to the tale I’m about to tell
Hell, we don’t gotta trade our shoes, and you ain’t gotta to walk no thousand miles

(Chorus)
In my shoes just to see
What it’s like to be me
I’ll be you, lets trade shoes
Just to see what it be like to
Feel your pain, you’ll feel mine
We’ll go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each others eyes

Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you
Don’t let them say you aint’ beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you

(Verse 3)
Nobody asked for life to deal us
With these bullshit hands we’re dealt
We gotta take these cards ourselves
and flip them don’t expect no help

Now I could’ve either just sat on my ass and pissed and moaned
Or take this situation in which I’m placed, get up and get my own
I was never the type of kid to wait by the door and pack his bags
Or sat on the porch and hoped and pray for his dad to show up, who never did!

I just wanted to fit in
In every single place
and every school I went
I dreamed of being that cool kid
Even if it meant acting stupid

And aunt Edna always told me
Keep making that face it’ll get stuck like that
Meanwhile I’m just standing there
Holding my tongue trying talk like “this”

Til I stuck my tongue on a frozen stop sign pole at 8 years old
I learned my lesson then, cuz I wasn’t trying to impress my friends no more
But I already told you my whole life story, not just based on my description
Cuz where you see it, from where you’re sitting, its prolly 110 percent different

I guess we would have to walk a mile in each other’s shoes at least
What size you wear? I wear 10’s, lets see if you could fit your feet

(Chorus)
In my shoes just to see
What it’s like to be me
I’ll be you, lets trade shoes
Just to see what it be like to
Feel your pain, you’ll feel mine
We’ll go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Looking through each others eyes

Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you
Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get fucked, just stay true to you

Lately I’ve been hard to reach
I’ve been too long on my own
Everybody has a private world
Where they can be alone

Are you calling me?
Are you trying to get through?
Are you reaching out for me?
Like I’m reaching out for you.

Yeah, to my babies, stay strong, dad will be home soon, and to the rest of the world. God gave you them shoes, to fit you… so put them on and wear them and be yourself man, be proud of who you are. Even if it sounds corny, don’t ever let no one tell you, you aint beautiful…

2009-06-10T03:18:00.004+08:00

i have c++ practical test 11 hours later.

i have school in 8hours+.

what am i thinking??

darn it. i need some money to splurgeeee..

holidays coming next week. argh! it don't seem like holiday to me though.

oh yeah. can't wait to play tennis with you, man.

2009-06-05T00:04:00.003+08:00

life is a game of poker.

sometimes you have to take risks in order to win big.
but big risks = bigger consequences.

HOWEVER, if you wanna take risks, you must persevere. thats what i learnt. because in the end your hard work will all pay off.

play it safe?
lose some, win some.
but you will still remain the same.

it all boils down to your cards. what is given to you for you to work with.

think it out.

all in all, who decides the outcome?
you do.

2009-05-19T04:06:00.003+08:00

my blog needs pics and photos, don't chu agree?

gonna get a new hp soon.. with a good camera. photography is one of my passions, music too.

well. just a short post.

2009-05-17T02:01:00.002+08:00

results of hip hop cca Foreign Bodies out on this Monday!

i'd be surprised if i get in. ROFL.

yay Man Utd champs again. now level with Liverpool. 18 league titles. but who cares abt them. its all abt us, baby.

Champs of the World, Champs of England. what abt Europe? we shall see next wed. =)

2009-05-06T00:23:00.002+08:00

my foot has been feeling way better. so much better that i think i can play this weekend. :D

btw, go play this game. its challenging, mind-numbing and SOOOO much better than sudoku. hahah.

http://www.miniclip.com/games/bloxorz/en/

291709

2009-05-05T00:39:00.002+08:00

argh. the feeling when i woke up this morning when excruciating.

my ankle felt worse than when i just injured it. the pain was so bad that i couldn't get up to walk to the bathroom.

BUUTTT..

good news was that the pain faded away the more i walked. so throughout the day it was getting better. and as i'm typing this, i don't feel it no more. so yeah i don't think i will be out of action for so long. oh yeah, not so much limping too. wheee~

supercala - here's where i forget to spell the super duper long word - fragilisticexpeleoxious!

correct?

bah who cares.. anyone up for a game of tennis???

Staccato.

2009-05-04T02:58:00.006+08:00

haven't been updating for a long time - didn't realise its been a month, wow. i'm just bummed out. so this will be a relatively brief post. doubt anybody still comes here.

school's started. i've tried to join a few ccas. hahah.

i've cut my hair. did some trimming on my own heh.

i think it looks nice and neat. job well done, Barber Rid.

and sadly, lotsa ppl don't recognise me in school. good? or bad thing?

and, i just sprained my ankle today. just when i was a the peak of my form. sigh, its like a breath of fresh air, playing on the left wing.

ahem, so if you see a limping malay guy with short hair, its not Mas Selamat. its me. do say hi though. heheh.

til then. i have to sleep. night class tmrw boohoo.

man, i feel.. disconnected. somehow.

Staccato indeed.

2009-04-05T21:33:00.002+08:00

went to watch my brother's football team play in the morning. they played at semb sec at 10am. yes morning. they came back from being 1-0 down to win 2-1.

the last goal was like woah, the right winger just flashed the ball past the keeper. i think the GK had no clue abt where the ball was. damn powerful ah, the shot. it flew from outside the box into the net in just milliseconds.

well den afterwards at around 5pm i went to kick ball with ll and yl. semb pri field was wet, but no mud at all. we played barefooted. i'm surprised that i can still kick long shots even though i wasn't wearing any boots or shoe. we tried all sorts of distances, from 15m to 40m i think.

well it was just practice and i gave the guys some tips on shooting long shots. i think they learned quite a bit today. well i almost dislocated my left shoulder 'cause i tried to head in a cross by ll. wet grass and momentum don't fo well together and i fell on my arse, with my left arm trying to support my body.

whew finally after a month without football, i felt alive again.

i wanna play a match before school starts.
quick get back your match practice, guys. . .

2009-03-29T18:12:00.003+08:00

yesterday

dear diary,

i had fun at agnes' birthday party. i was best dressed ROFL for the theme "Rock Star". well there were the Campus Superstar ppl too.

after the party, came the real fun. i shall not elaborate more on this, but darn, we did a lot of bullcrap stuff-me, mat beng, ll and emochan. i'll never forget the night of Beggar Poker and If i win. hilarious shit.

here are some of the things we had to do:

drink a bottle of water at one go
hump the dustbin for 2 rounds
chew shoelaces
and blah blah alot more. A LOT. its just too embarrassing to blog it out.

2009-03-21T18:02:00.001+08:00

i've been having really weird dreams and they all revolve around this same person.

what's my mind trying to tell me?

2009-03-15T03:48:00.004+08:00

hey! wanna spot a liverpool fan? here's how:

1. they're always living in the past glory days.
2. they will always boast and brag. always.
3. they can be quite annoying, especially when their team wins.
4. they are petty. real petty.
5. they will use "you'll never walk alone" at least once a week.
6. they will go to the extent of calling or texting their rivals to tease them after their team gets one over the rival.

okay. now you got the basic guide on how to spot a liverpool fan.
now go out there and enjoy!

know any friends that support liverpool? try to match the characteristics then!

have fun spotting, dudes and dudettes. haw haw.

seriously, liverpool fans have these common traits.
witnessed, observed, cross-referenced, proven time and again.

i'd rather walk alone. hah haa.

i am a Red - Red Devil that is.

2009-03-10T03:59:00.001+08:00

Step 1: go to www.muse.mu
Step 2: click on "Media"
Step 3: look at the bottom right corner of the screen.
Step 4: press "Play"

there you have it. MUSE.

man, i really wanna get the Muse belt which costs 10pounds.

2009-03-07T01:32:00.005+08:00

i shall post for the sake of posting. i just wanna write something out here so that my blog doesn't look like its rotting. so okay this post is actually a Filler Post. something to fill in the space thats left here for me to write about.

there's alot of things happening in my life but i'm just plain lazy to write them down here and in case i'm being tracked by some private company or government or whatever lol. after watching Eagle Eye, its like, you can't reveal too much of yourself online and shit 'cause its like open to everyone in the whole world. and that is why i still don't have a facebook account, although i still have my ever ancient friendster which i never ever absolutely use anymore. so yeah i'm not that really connected to the "Web" and stuff. so yeah. yeah.

and uhhh i have a match tmrw and i'm still not going to sleep. my body clock is broken 'cause i've been sleeping at times around 3-5am almost every night but at those times are actually when i literally am knocked out unconcious. anddddd i will most probably miss breakfast the next morning and have a heavy lunch and yada yada yada. i think its probably got something to do with something on my mind, so i can switch off that easily you know. like its always wide awake, waiting for more and more.

i've been coughing like mad these past few days. i think imma gonna dead. how my gonna play to fullest if coughing yo? get whatta mean?

you know, sometimes we think abt stuff and we just chuck it to one side of the mind. well apparently its no good 'cause the loop you have opened has not closed. so eventually the task is not fulfilled. i bet each of us got a heck load of open loops in our head which are not closed yet. and that, my friends, is one of the reasons why we sometimes lapse in concentration.

and holy mother of pearl!

there was this girl at the airport just now who walked past me. she gave me the stare of death man! its was an extremely cold blooded stare that can burn your soul through your eyes. woah mama. althought it was like a split second, i could see the intensity of the glare. some supermassive black hole of and eye she must have.

and no i do not know who this girl was.

oh man, what am i writing. . . .

oh well, the beauty lies within i guess.

i bet nobody ever reads my blog so, uh why bother. ROFL.

unintended lah~

2009-02-24T23:56:00.005+08:00

if i had a nickel everytime somebody:

commented on my hair
thought i was chinese
thinks i don't talk much
asks if i have a gf
thinks i'm skinny

i would be filthy rich man!

seriously. do i look chinese? alamak even the mak cik field warden at sembawang pri thought i was chinese. no offence to the race though, but i have dark skin and resemble a malay guy. sigh. and ppl don't seem to get enough of my hair. thats it! i'm cutting it! (soon)

and woohoo end of exams. i have up til april to slack my balls off. BUT i won't actually do that. i wanna earn some moolah, get a job and buy stuff.

whew match on 7th March. spectators welcome.

Venue : Sembawang Secondary

Time: 3.15pm kickoff
Ticket price: $0.00

(you actually think i'm going to take your money? c'mon!)

2009-02-12T02:24:00.005+08:00

well my fitness level has indeed dropped but i still managed to run 2.4km in 11min 56secs. the next time i run, it better be closer to 11mins.

see, thats what life is like, you set achievable goals. you shouldn't have high expectations of yourself. you take it slow. that way, you don't disappoint yourself easily. instead you will feel more determined to achieve that goal because it is so near, yet not that hard to achieve. slowly rise till you can't go no further. its like pole vaulting. or high jumping. just look at the buggers who keep breaking their previous records. lol.

if i achieve running below 11 mins, i would like to maintain it at 10. that was my timing when i ran in sec 4. boy, i sure wanted to get a single digit that time. but well i got exactly 10, so i'm satisfied for the moment.

i realised, i have lost my ability to wake up in the morning! and i have been missing the most important meal of the day - BREAKFAST! almost everyday, man.

love is in the air,
not in a pair,
but in despair.

here lies this single soul,
he questions,
where's my baby to hold?

he knows he's doing the right thing,
by not having any flings.
as the feeling grows stronger,
can he resist this temptation any longer?

i'm breaking the habit.

2009-02-04T14:59:00.003+08:00

yesterday was the first day of intensive training for the hols. sadly for me, i found out that my fitness level has dropped dramatically. why? i took 15 mins to complete 2.4km. :O

like GYX said, "your fitness is like kayaking upstream. the moment you stop, you will fall back really fast." he's most probably right about this.

darn it, the last time i ran 2.4km, it only took 10 mins. exactly 10. and now i realise i must start running again. and thanks to Sufyan who suggested training during the holidays. i guess we each have our objectives. and so me, O-Yan and GYX will be present at Yishun stadium every alternate day.

well here's what i did yesterday:
2.4km run
7 + 5 + 3 + 2 (assisted) chin ups
total 70 sit ups
1.2km jog
25 push ups

PLUS, after all that, we walked from Khatib to Sembawang mrt.

and after that i took the mrt back to khatib to meet munk, loon, pongy, tj and dex to head to the gym. well since i was drained, i didn't exactly do much in the gym. but i still did some work you see.

at the end of the day, i decided to test my 400m sprint and tj clocked me at 1min 15sec. darn it. it sucked but i shall take it as further motivation to train myself harder.

2009-02-02T23:05:00.002+08:00

i am not happy right now. i am frustrated. why do You let him continue treating my mum like that?

i can't stand to see my Mum crying her heart out. what bad has she done to you? seriously. can't she take a rest for a day without doing her housework? she already has been doing it everyday without fail. she's always tired and she always sleeps late because of you, FUCKER. the moment she opens her eyes, all she does is work. most of the time, she never eats until evening. i pity my mum a lot and at the same time i greatly admire her spirit. why does she have to endure all this pain and misery? all you do is scold and beat. thats ALL you do. can't you just sit down and talk? you act as if you're the king. not even getting up to get your own food. always ordering ppl around. what, you work from 8 to 6 means you too tired to make your own coffee and serve your own food ah. you don't even get off that fat ass of yours to do the simplest things like getting your OWN handphone when it rings. i know for a fact that you even slack in your office and take long naps.

you used to beat us up just because you're bigger size. sometimes with your fists, and when i was small, with your leather belt. are you human? i shall answer that. NO you're a FUCKER. you don't deserve my respect, you never did.now you know why i severely hate you. i don't look up to you one bit- even as a child, i looked for other figures to follow. i realise, you're a fucking fucker. you don't deserve my mum. i don't even know why she married you. she is the best wife you can find i swear wholeheartedly. she does practically EVERYTHING. you don't even know how much she has sacrificed. you never ever appreciate what she has done. you just assume she's the maid and that she must always be doing housework 24/7. she gets tired too, FUCKER. it ain't easy being my mum. i watch her every single second i'm at home. and what the fuck are you doing at work? you don't even know whats happening at home. all the effort she put in to the housework and not even the slightest bit of appreciation. sure i help her as and when i can but that doesn't make her job any easier.

he doesn't even want to listen to my reasoning. okay, if you won't listen to me now, you shall never hear from me ever again. when you're old and dying, you can count on me not being there. i shall only send my regards. i will never EVER accept any apology from you. the only thing you can do is to beg my mum on your knees for forgiveness. and i don't think that is enough. for all i know, you'll just return to your normal self and start doing the same things again. i have seen it. and i know it. you'll never change. never ever.

i just hopes he gets whats coming to him. Allah i wish i could kill him now and let him forever burn in hell. that way, my mum won't have to endure his shit anymore. however it will be a big sin on my part. for all i know i want him to suffer. suffer alot. therefore i will leave it to Allah to judge him.

i have no father. just a bastard who lives in the same house.

2009-01-27T22:38:00.004+08:00

The boy's name Farid \f(A)-rid\ is pronounced fah-REED. It is of Arabic and Hindi origin, and its meaning is "exceptional, unequaled; wide".

Baby names that sound like Farid are Fred, Ford, Ferd, Frido, Fried and Ward. Other similar baby names are Faris and Jarid.
Farid is a very rare male first name and an uncommon surname.

-----------------------------------

Farid	Unique. Alone	male	Muslim
Farid	Without Rival; One of a Kind	male	Arabic

-----------------------------------

AHMAD: Variant spelling of Arabic Ahmed, meaning "praiseworthy.
AHMED (أحمد): Arabic name meaning "praiseworthy."
FARID (فريد): Arabic name derived from the word farada, meaning "unique."

-------------------------------------------------

2009-01-24T20:05:00.004+08:00

i am stuck. stuck i say. this niggling project of mine. sheesh. i am not sure, therefore i dare not do. and the deadline is like next week! damn this world and their bad plannings!

and i want to play football. damn you guys.. always never turn up. always end up too little ppl. i wanna play in more matches. argh. darn it.

rewind~
i just watched nyp vs rp yesterday evening. nyp won 5-2 and to be honest, they could have scored a lot more goals. nyp's right winger, Raymond, missed a number of chances in front of goal.
his substitute, some guy wearning no.22, blasted the ball wide when he was left unmarked and the ball dropped in front of him. i guess nyp's defence was good because rp only had a shot at goal when half time was approaching, if i remember correctly.

nyp's left back was recently recruited this year as i saw him at last year's try-outs. he's passing was like a knife through hot butter, i should say. if you don't rmb who he is, he was the indian guy with the long hair.

rp's backline was so high up, which was very risky because nyp had broken thier offside trap more than once to score. plus, i saw that nyp had really fast wingers and strikers as they outran rp's defenders quite a number of times.

however, i have to give credit to rp for grabbing two consolation goals, both scored by no.14. man, he was a real goal poacher.

his first goal was a scrappy one where nyp's gk failed to retrieve the ball in the box and his second was scored from a set piece.
imagine this: a freekick was swung in from the right. he was lurking at the far post. as the ball came in, he creeped in from behind and volleyed the ball into the net. pure class.

oh well, a few players got injured in the match. there was one incident where it was a 50/50 ball to be won in the air. and both players contested. and i couldn't see clearly but i think some elbows were being swung. nyp's player ended up with a bleeding head while i couldn't see what happened to the rp guy. AND a fight almost broke out in the match.

well you can say that the time spent watching the match was worthwhile because there was plenty of action, skills, and thrills. eventhough i watched it alone..

since there's no pictures in my last six posts..

meet Daniela Hantuchova. isn't she lovely?
she's from Slovakia + she's a professional tennis player.

2009-01-22T21:32:00.003+08:00

a day of rest is a day without project.

yet on this day of rest, there will be studying for three tests tmrw. 2 math, 1 data, communication, networking.

my my my..

i wonder how barack obama feels right now..

no problem? that's how it will turn out.

2009-01-21T22:26:00.002+08:00

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i feel really really lazy.

and when i am lazy, there's bound to be collateral damage. somebody, directly or indirectly, will be negatively affected. that's why i dislike being lazy. but the feeling is just so good, ya know? doing nothing, and clearing your mind of worries.. ever watch Disney's Timon and Pumbaa? their catchphrase "Hakuna Matata"? i think its something like a "problem-free philosophy".

i feel it has something to do with my laid-back nature and my relaxed approach to things. darn, i have to change this mentality. not totally change it. just tweak it to suit most situations.

well i have to conclude that actions speak louder than words!

and cyber bullying happens because the bullies are at the comfort of their own home or place safely insulting ppl behind their desktops. wanna insult me? say it to my face, punk! i'm sure you're not so brave with me glaring into your eyes!

ahh crap. most things in life nowadays are crap.

2009-01-14T00:15:00.001+08:00

Don't piss me off or i'll relocate your nose!

savvy?

i still do wear that necklace sometimes..

2009-01-08T12:47:00.003+08:00

i had really weird dreams this morning.

the moment i drifted away from consciousness, i slipped into the dreamworld. i was lying on a really comfortable bed with white sheets. and there was this girl lying beside me. i was sorta kissing her. the really really weird thing is that, it felt so real. like, damn real.

den i suddenly woke up.

i tossed and turned to fall asleep again. and in the end, i did. at around 6am.

this time, it was awhile until i dreamt of something.

i remember feeling sad, depressed. i know i was going home. i think i was going heading home from a funeral. and den somebody said my uncle just passed away. then it hit me. hard. i believed it. you see, my uncle is really ill in real life. den i cried. i cried as i was walking.

the next thing i know, i was awake. tears were streaming down my face.. onto my pillow.

to make things worse, my uncle, mom and grand dad just visited the cemetery yesterday. eeek. very grim indeed.

i never want to experience that ever again. -.-
whether its just me, or an omen. never ever.

i want none of these.

2009-01-07T16:04:00.002+08:00

woah.. i almost brushed my teeth with shampoo instead of toothpaste today. ALMOST.

don't know why, man. i just instinctively picked up the shampoo bottle and almost squeezed shampoo on my toothbrush.

shows how busy my mind is at the moment.

got alot of stuff on my mind and all that.

phew~..

2009-01-04T00:28:00.005+08:00

wow. everyone is like posting abt 08 memories and reflecting on what they have done. and like sayin' happy new year and stuff. well i go against the flow and not post it out. 09 is not near, its here.

i can't believe it. i'm gonna turn 18 in like 3 months and 6 days. last year really flew past didn't it. it seriously feels like a few weeks instead of a whole year. oh well. its a new dawn, its a new day. its a new life?

so to speak, my tutor asked for my new year resolutions and that got me thinking. real hard.

hmm
be punctual ALL THE TIME?
be more responsible?
should i fool around lesser?
should i get into a relationship?

well you get an idea.

i just thought of this random thing:
learn from the past, live in the present and live for the future!

ahhhhhh i'm feeling lazy again. shall end here then.

my blog is just the tip of the iceberg.
there's.. more to me than meets the eye.

savvy?

2008-12-30T02:42:00.003+08:00

me complain. me no play well today. me team never pass the ball on the ground. me team long ball, run run. tired easy. ooga oog. and and somebodeh stepped me left footie. pain pain arg. bruise ugg. but overall, me think me team play ok. need improve. less run, need more pass and MORE positioning. and me want to play striker. me no like centre. ug uggg ogg aag. 2-2 eagh. win by penalty. ooh ah cantona~

2008-12-26T23:43:00.010+08:00

aw man.. post-AFF Suzuki Cup mood: so Singapore lost to Vietnam. we soooo do not deserve to lose that.

BUT it seems now that vietnam is en route to becoming the champs for they have beaten Thailand 2-1 in Bangkok for the 1st leg of the final. so, i can accept it if we were beaten by the champions. kinda save face a bit la. heh heh.

and damn it! 2 weeks of break is too short! it flies past so fast! kinda like a fly when you try to smack it.yea. and when its filled with assignments and project, it ain't a break anymore! its like going on vacation but still doing some work on your laptop. that just ain't right! know what'm sayin'?

btw, have you noticed that i have compiled a whole new playlist? its awesome so go listen. please inform me if you can listen to the whole list without skipping any song.
-'cause thats what i'm trying to do, you see. make a list full of songs that you just have to listen to. lol i'm crazy.

alas, shall reply the tags here. 'cause some girl technically did not spam my blog and i have to reply to a lot of her tags. haha.

GIRL: HI FARID, YOU ARE DAMN NONSENSICAL.
farid: hi there. why thank you. :)

GIRL: YAYYYYYYY
farid: uh, YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (i'm cluelessly yay-ing)

GIRL: CHANGE YOUR HAIRSTYLE PLEASE, IT'S GETTING A TAD TOO COMMON.
farid: yea. i noticed that too. some of my friends actually almost approached guys that look like me but is not me.

GIRL: MAYBE YOU MIGHT WANT TO CONSIDER STRAIGHTENING IT? HAHAHAHA. JOKE
farid: actually, i HAVE thought of it. ahaha. its just not feasible you know?

GIRL: OKAY, I FIGURED SINCE I DONT COME HERE EVERYDAY SO I SHOULD LEAVE MORE TAGS WHEN I COME, SO THEORATICALLY, IT'S NOT SPAMMING.
farid: riiiiiiiiiiight.. fine, i accept your lame excuse. ahahahaha. just kidding, dear. its always a pleasure to have you around.

GIRL: ANYWAYS, HAVE AN ENJOYABLE X'MAS ;D
farid: YOU HAVE A GREAT AXE-MAS TOO :) :):|:):):)

okay.

i shall end on a good note:

B flat

2008-12-20T22:19:00.003+08:00

there goes my "holiday".. one week of it has just whizzed by. sigh.. with all these projects, assignments and friends and family plans.. sigh.

and ms wong said, "enjoy your holiday"..?? damn............................

it DOES look cheery when its colourful...

2008-12-14T01:27:00.001+08:00

i'm not planning to buy this bag, but guess the price guys..

hint: its exclusive.

2008-12-11T02:09:00.002+08:00

sup ppl.

after school today, i went to play football for llewelyn's friend's team today against Hwa Chong alumni. it was at St. Wilfrid Field. heard of it before? its in Boon Keng. and today's actually the first time i ventured there.

jeff, edmunk, llew and dex had went off first and i kinda played only in the second half since i got school and stuff. it was really scorching hot 'cause we played at around 1pm-3pm. and you can actually feel your rubber studs melting away.

oh, i forgot to mention that we played on artificial turf. wah, die die don't want to fall sial- with the astro burn fear and the thought of my skin tearing lingering in my head.

guess what? we won 5-4. didn't really expect to win the match. since the hwa chong boys seemed older, bigger and faster. i came in when it was 4-3. me being on the winning team. lol.
i'm actually proud of this win, rofl.

there was this big tall muscular striker dude in our team. his name is Kai or somewhat like that. he may be a little slow, but boy can he shoot. he scored the winning goal afterall..

and then there was the other prominent player in the team. Nigel. he's effing skillful. the way he plays is just, woah. the best player on the field i suppose. he's got composure, skill, pace and a tattoo of a big Christian Cross across his shoulder blades.

so.
okay guys, we have a match against these dudes. and these are the players we need to look out for. and good job jeffrey for earning and scoring a penalty. kudos too for edmund, who assisted the equalising goal.

as for the llew, dex and me...... we need to step up for the next match.

hopefully we have enough quality to see them off.

hopefully.

2008-12-02T21:33:00.002+08:00

i never knew.

i never knew that this kinda things can happen in real life. you always see it on tv but you''d never expect it to happen so close to you. what am i talking abt? sudden death. sudden death of a person during a joyful occasion. i feel like i'm in a drama or soap opera. seriously, it kinda reminds me that things that happen in real life usually inspire such tv shows or movies.

damn.

the world can be so random.

you may never know what will happen next.

life is random.. and so flexible. next thing you know, dinosaurs will be discovered and they'll find the Loch Ness monster and Bigfoot.

okay, that was a little out of point but oh well, you get what i mean.

2008-11-17T23:59:00.002+08:00

dang, i keep seeing 11:11 everywhere.. no matter day or night.

isit true that someone misses you when you accidentally chance upon seeing this time?

well, lets leave that to the philosophers to answer the question.

and why do you hate me so much? and why do i get the feeling that you're being hostile towards me?

2008-11-06T12:44:00.001+08:00

i haven't been blogging for awhile and i'll admit it. i'm lazy. i also think that blogs can be used to track ppl and their daily activities, thus making them vulnerable to spies and stuff. so yeah. sorry but i just had to bullcrap 'cause thats just me, ya know.. yeah. and so, this blog is full of bullcrap. i don't even know why you bother reading all this sh!t. isit because you care about me? or isit that all this lame stuff is interesting to you?

wait.

i know.

you have nothing to do right now and you just happen to be reading this to pass some time. ain't that right? hahaha. btw, the real blog post begins below. this is just the prelude of this post.

this is the 4th week of school and to be honest, i'm losing the motivation to study. i feel so lifeless and hollow inside. its like there's something missing in my life. sure, i do have great friends whom i go out with sometime, but thats only temporary joy. when i get home, and go to school, i am this empty shell, kind of like a government zombie. STUDY SO THAT YOU HAVE A GOOD FUTURE!

yesterday, the ppl who got into the directors list, including me, met the deputy director of business infotech. and he said something about hidden talent. and that most of the oldies you see on the streets wanted to do something else with their lives. and that when they think back, they would regret not following their passion and that its too late.

you know, i feel like i can do anything i want now. and that i have unlimited potential if i give my 100%. i'm sure some of you feel the same way too. but now, present day, we're all just taking the "safe" route to ensure a stable future. i can only dream about playing some sport on the world stage.

so.. my point is..

IF THERE IS ANY TALENT SCOUT OUT THERE, I'M RIGHT HERE, MAN!!
DEVELOP MY TALENT,
UNLEASH MY POTENTIAL.

man, i think i'm just bullshitting again.. but then, its true to some extent..

now for some pics so that you won't fall asleep and drool on your keyboard..

my baby cousin took this photo of me back then. i think he doesn't want to capture my face for some apparent reason. lol.

hey guys, can we go and eat at some fancy restaurant while on formal outing?

and... this is what you get when you provide some pebbles to a creative guy on a rattan mat.

thats all folks. hurhurhur hilk hilk.

2008-10-20T16:04:00.004+08:00

i think i need to change my blogskin so that i will be inspired to blog more.

ain't that right?

some recent songs that are currently stuck in my head:
Maroon 5 - Goodnight goodnight
Daniel Powter - Next Plane Home
The Script - The Man Who Can't Be Moved

i just love music. :)

2008-10-09T01:04:00.002+08:00

just my luck eh? today i wanted to go to courts at cause way and it had to close. apparently the staff members had gone on to enjoy a dinner and dance at some fancy hotel. and just for one day, wednesday, it was closed! the only day i decided i wanted to go to courts to but something. sheesh man. i guess it will have to wait til tmrw.

a'ight. the sunburn i got from sentosa last saturday ain't that bad anymore. the feeling now is something you would feel if you had thick skin. haha. anyway, i'm dark again. and i can practically see a tan line near my waist there. its amazing how white i was before last saturday. and for sure, my ass is as white as ever. lol i don't know why i wrote that here.

AHEM. SPOILER for EAGLE EYE ALERT!
right, today i caught a movie titled Eagle Eye. the movie was not half bad, but still it kinda was bad. sheesh what am i talking about? the movie IS bad. but not THAT bad. geddit? i think you don't, but who cares. the action scenes, especially the ones on the road, were VERY messy. you wouldn't know what happened even if the car turned into some robot shit thing.

so anyway, the movie was so-so. not that good, not that bad. quite exciting, yet boring enough to make chad sleep. ROFL! shia labeouf, the lead actor gave quite a good performance and uhhthe thought of computers taking over the world is scary. 'cause this jerry shaw guy was tracked through his blog, online social networks, chats and yeah you get the gist of it.

ahh i'm damn bored now and there's camp on thurs. it shall be called Associates Camp instead of Rangers Camp, 'cause most of the rangers are missing and err alot of associates are going. LMAO.

i think i should stop writing this post 'cause i'm really talking dumbshit right now. haha.

so

enjoy

your

life. :)

2008-09-16T00:06:00.008+08:00

*yawn*

its 12am now. 16 september. the day the results of the exams will be coming out.
to be honest, i'm neither anxious nor nervous nor excited. and erm, i'm gonna

go check on it now.

apparently i can't log into the e-services 'cause all the punks are trying to log-in. the server is overloaded.. -_- i guess i'll have to wait a little longer. til den, i shall post a few pics to tell the tale of my life for the past week.

as you can see here, my faithful green specs snapped into two. it was a freak accident, man. i'm not gonna elaborate but yeah, freaky.

ah.. damn sad lah. my trusty eyewear.. worn it for around 2-3 years. and yes, its sort of been one of my trademark signatures. like someone will say "the kid with the green specs?" "ahh yes! that guy wearing the green specs."

if i were to wear one side, it'd look like this.^

but i've moved on.. to the bronze one. rofl.

and now i look like this.^ not much of a difference i guess.. but look how happy i am. ROFL.

well, here are some random pics i took in the past.

here a pic i took. its err from a New Urban Male shop at Heeren i think. well, its just plain strange.

this is SP taken from dover mrt. this was the morning after me, llew and pongy studied, picnic-ed and thon-ed at moberly which is some place in SP. it was damn fun. food, laptops, fun

erm this here is errrrrrrr some rocket flying in the sky. or some missile or UFO maybe. lol.

alright this was taken just yesterday and the place is littered with hell notes for a long distance of 10metres. walao. have some responsibility can?

this here is some guy who tore his pants. lol. shant elaborate who, although you can easily tell. hahaa. nuahs ah nuahs.

sorry for the lack of quality of the pics. i only have a measly 1.3mp phone with me. haha.

i think the guys are gonna pick llew from the airport tmrw and we're gonna go watch babylon a.d on wednesday with chad, fatty, yangyang, llew and probably more.

hey i just got my results. its well, okay ah. compared to my friend who got a GPA of 4.0. wahh, i salute you.

2008-09-12T23:30:00.003+08:00

wow.. its been long since i posted man.. i feel like i'm neglecting this blog. well not to worry good people. i'm back.

i'd post a picture or two but i'm just damn lazy to upload them from my camera/phone to the comp and then to blogger. haha i'm such a lazy bum. or maybe i can just find some old photo and upload it here.

tadaa.. like this one here.. this a pic of my friend's watch. we were bored and great things happen when ppl got nothing better to do. lol. nice eh? 12:34 .56.

sigh. my life is a routine. ever since the holidays started. i've been staying home everyday for the past week and heck its monotonous. its like..

step 1: wake up at noon, go to the toilet.
step 2: go back to sleep.
step 3: wake up a few hours later.
step 4: bathe.
step 5: pray.
step 6: stone, play PS2, or tv til sunset. den pray again.
step 7: break my fast.
step 8: wash forks, spoon and plate.
step 9: rest awhile.
step 10: pray and get ready to go mosque.
step 11: ride bike with dad to mosque.
step 12: spend like 2 hours there praying.
step 13: go back home.
step 14: eat supper.
step 15: tv, PS2, comp, or stone til the wee hours of the morning.
step 16: sleep.
step 17: wake up at 5am, eat breakfast.
step 18: brush teeth den sleep.*

*after step 18, go back to step 1.

i think you have an idea of what my life has been this holiday. kinda makes me want to go back to school. its ironic though, that when you're in school, you want the hols to come.. BUT when its the hols, you want to go back to school. it just this weird thing ya'know.. you only realise something's missing when its gone.. and then you would want it back.. or something like that.

well, i'm certainly not enjoying my holidays.. just spending my time waiting.. and waiting.. and it doesn't help that fasting slows things down. time seems to be going oh so slow..

and so yeah i've been such a lazy bastard.. slacking my balls off like jonathan. i'd rather go to the beach, but no swimming while i'm fasting.. no sports or i might get thirsty or something.. i kinda feel like a nocturnal animal or some sort. only can do things at night. or i can go out in the day and be back home before 7. but thats just tiresome. -_-

what the heck am i rambling abt. well, i guess i'll still go for soccer if there is.. but i'm always busy during the weekends.. going grandma's house lah.. aunt's lah.. ahhhhh sick. -_- i think i'll be asking ppl out next week so that my hols aren't so wasted. til den, i'll just be at home.. doing chores like a good boy.

and uhh anyone going out can please ask me along too? haha. zzzzzzzzz -_-

i feel like changing my blogskin.. but that takes time.. and maybe i'll add in some javascript functions in too. so that my talents won't go to waste. lalala..

2008-08-19T16:48:00.002+08:00

i stumbled upon a group of dancers called JabbaWockeeZ and their awesome.
here check 'em out. you'll never get sick of watching them dance.

congrats phelps. 8 gold medals.. wheeeeeeee -_- zzz..

you're just a sad song with nothing to sing about a life-long wait for a hospital stay.

2008-08-17T23:23:00.002+08:00

the only question on my mind right now is "Why?". what have i done to deserve this? the feeling is horrible.

its torture.

2008-08-08T20:35:00.002+08:00

Beijing Olympics. 08-08-08 and the opening ceremony starts at 08:08pm. auspicious to the max. lol. very special indeed. nothing special happened to me today, though. just another day to go by. i'm now sitting in front of the lappy, watching the opening ceremony of the 2008 Olympics as i'm typing this post. oooo i like the martial art part of the opening ceremony, where hundreds of martial artists show their choreographed moves in a circle. wow, the performers are dang perfectionists, man. ahhhhh, stsrting to feel bored again. i get easily bored nowadays, as if there's no more thrills in life to look forward to.

oh well, i can always play my FM. wow, there's an European beauty singing in Chinese! cool.

Fortunate Athletes Run In Domes.

2008-08-07T18:39:00.002+08:00

one word: mundane. that totally describes most of the time spent during the week. first of all, no school, only revision lectures. second of all, i've been procrastinating alot.

the only highlight of the week would be the project module presentation on wednesday, which was not such a big deal anyway. i don't even know why there was such a big fuss over it in the first place. but it also helped that the lecturer we were presenting to was pretty cute. what's wrong with me? lol.

so anyway next week is study week and the following week after that would be the start of exams.

lets go full force, man.

2008-08-01T12:20:00.002+08:00

schoooool is getting boring nowadays.. i'm always looking forward to the weekends.. which makes time go faster. but at the same time, i'm not having fun so times stands still when i'm at school. i don't want it to go so fast 'cause the next thing i know, i'll be sitting in the hall doing my exams. this is all so contradicting. zzzzzzzzzz.. and i feel more alone than ever although i'm always around ppl. i don't know why. but i just feel like this.

gotta go friday prayer. be good boy.

2008-07-14T01:22:00.002+08:00

well i have been having weird dreams lately. for the past nights. i guess when i go to sleep when i'm really tired, a dream is sure to follow up. i'm not gonna elaborate, but its only for my reference. the first weird dream was that i was kissing some girl which i seriously don't rmb who. the second dream was that i was playing paint ball in the mrt cabin. another dream was that i was cuddling with some girl beside me. and the last was that i had a day out at some village with my grandfather, who seemed healthier and more mobile..

sometimes i wonder if these dreams are trying to tell me something.. whether it is a warning, a prediction- like a vision- or just my imagination.

but one thing is for sure:
my mind is playing tricks on me. -_-

2008-07-12T02:53:00.005+08:00

i found something inspirational in John Mayer's lyrics of No Such Thing:

"I just found out there's no such thing as the real world
just a lie you've got to rise above"

well i feel so sleepy yet i can't sleep because there's so many things going through my head. plus i have not updated my poor blog for quite some time. so i guess i should at least post something for you guys to read. recently the projects are becoming more intense and the expectations are indeed very high for my group, as said by my tutor who had had a look at the project website we have done so far. this is madness because my tutor expects too much from us.

and my stupid javascript application won't work no matter what i try. this is the part where ppl say i shouldn't give up on anything and i agree with that. if you want something to happen then you should strive for it, no matter what it takes. well this is most probably one of the most used cliches but you have to live with it.

reality may be just a lie, but we're still living in this lie and we must prove that we can be successful by rising above it.

anyway, i've made some general observations that i'd like to share..

emotion greatly affects the way ppl think and behave but they just can't totally control it. this is why emotional ppl are so hard to communicate with. they are easily influenced by their emotions that it will start to take over.

here are two very good examples to prove my point:

you are so angry that you snap and lose your temper. your anger takes control and you don't give a care in the world abt what you say or do, because you forget to think of the consequences. you will also stop listening as you aggressively want to vent your anger, by raising your voice etc.
you are so heartbroken that you start to sob uncontrollably. the depression makes you have this overwhelming feeling that there is no more hope in the world and you just want to cry. you can fight the feeling, but the more you think of it, the sadder you get.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i have personally experienced the following before with my dad, who is short-tempered:
a discussion may turn into a debate, and a debate will eventually turn into an argument, where the argument is emotionally charged.

*tip: try your best not to let your emotions take over whenever somebody vents his/her anger on you. that way, you are able to think clearly and therefore not stoop to such low levels and not resort to using vulgarities and childish comebacks to rebut.

different ppl have different perspectives or point of views of things and these are just my opinions, nothing else. if anything else, its crap.

shattered windows and the sound of drums, i can't believe what you have become.

2008-07-12T02:09:00.002+08:00

COLDPLAY
Viva La Vida

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemies eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt, and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
Once you know there was never, never an honest word
That was when I ruled the world
(Ohhh)

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in.
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People could not believe what I'd become
Revolutionaries Wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world
(Ohhhhh Ohhh Ohhh)

Hear Jerusalem bells are ringings
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
I know Saint Peter will call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world
Oooooh Oooooh Oooooh

2008-06-28T00:23:00.002+08:00

first week of school and i already feel so drained. i think i must take care of my health already sia. i just took a nap and i woke up feeling even more restless.

plus, there's a street soccer competition at MDIS on Saturday morning and i'll be a reserve for Emuchan's team. dang, i think my stamina is worsening after missing 3 or 4 weeks of soccer. sometimes i wonder if i can run like before.

anyway, i think i wanna switch from midfield to striker whenever i'm playing on grass. i feel that there are alot of goals in me. den as for the street competition, i'm think i'll be spraying the passes from midfield. hopefully we can win this tournament. i haven't had a medal or trophy all my life.

and after that, i think i will be playing field soccer with the boys. see how lah HOR.

now i go bathe den sleep ah. gdnight.

2008-06-20T03:41:00.003+08:00

here's a pic of myself when i was in err Sec2?

dang. its 3.41am in the morning. now is halftime during the Euro2008 portugal vs. germany match. guess what? portugal is losing by 2 goals to 1. luckily they managed to pull one goal back.

c'mon guys, give it your best in the 2nd half. as if they can hear me. haha. but i can imagine that as the halftime team talk by luiz felipe scolari, portugal's coach.

and erm, while blog-surfing, i found out that a lot of pictures taken of me, are lying somewhere in you peoples' computers. haha. apparently, a lot of people have photos of me, that i do not even have myself. ahh, nehmind *does the hand thing tianjie taught me earlier today*.
-point to neh, den point to mind. get it? neh-mind. sheesh. sometimes i wonder why such a simple thing can keep me entertained.

just now went to tj's house to play mahjong. its been a while since i last touched those colourful tiles. and so yeah, we played from 9plus to about 11.30pm. den, llewelyn decided to go to pongys house to watch the Euro08 match. tj wasn't allowed to go by his dad and erm, me being a good boy, decided to go home.

and so, the 2nd half of the match has started. thats all for tonight, or should i say, today.

please ask me out ppl. i'm bored being stuck at home. thanks.

2008-06-13T01:28:00.002+08:00

well, this is the vid of the factory that caught fire. later on, i found out that it was a soap and perfume factory. hmm interesting eh?

2008-06-13T00:16:00.002+08:00

ALL TAG REPLIES WILL BE HERE:

ANNE: RELINK!!
farid: relinked.

Pei Ni: HELLOS...x)) u are in frisbee team? lOls..
farid: yup. heh. in frisbee, but only playing recreationally.

iffah: eh? the factory was near our house? i think i slept like a log cos i dint notice anything.
farid: yeah.. haha. don't you always sleep like a dog? (:

jun liang: lol you asshole. i'm a 3rd sergeant already okay. btw we didn't watch indy. the bastard ticket guy gave us wrong ticket to narnia. but it was good. and this is a long tag. lol.
farid: wah, big rank already sia. hahaha. wah the ticket guy give wrong ticket to NARNIA. ROFL. oh, i read from your blog too. and erm, this is a long reply.

Wei Thai: aw man farid didnt became bbqed ? darn wad a waste TT
farid: unfortunately, nope. and dude, nobody eats bbq-ed farid. bbq-ed farid eats people. LOL.

NUAHS: HELLOO. decided to drop by to see poly student's life lol. so now what's up?
farid: wow, rare appearance from you, my bro. poly life is pretty slack and uh, its too slack i think. heh.

Alicia: I think its time t relink Hehe. Cya arnd! ;)
farid: thanks for the link. see ya too. (:

siyun': giant, ikea . hahahhaa !! lol =x
farid: yeah! awesome pillows and ice-cream!

SABRINA: you sprained your ankle?? TSKTSK. get well soon to kick! =D haha atiqah ankle swollen, you sprain. tsk, you guys ah...
farid: thanks. actually i'm recovering fast. i can walk but not run. ha! oh yah, and atiqah injured her ankle because she clumsy seh. hee hee. (;

Wei Thai: aiyo farid look on the bright side i oso injured my ankle damm bad 2 weeks le still injured
farid: wow, why is everbody injuring their ankles?? ROFL. SO.. get well soon to all of us who are injured.

2008-06-06T15:25:00.004+08:00

bad news guys.. i sprained my left ankle last Tuesday during Frisbee. and now i can't run or kick a soccer ball. i can barely walk without feeling intense pain. nevertheless, i shall be strong.

oh yah, this morning at around 4am, a factory about a few kilometres from my home exploded. from my balcony, i could see the inferno going on there. and i think some LPGs were blown up 'cause there were multiple blasts of flames. the thick black smoke rose up to the skies, polluting the fresh morning air.

i seriously spammed videos and photos on that particular occurrence. AND, i shall post them the next time. so, look out for it in the news, peeps.

i hadn't kicked a ball in 3 weeks. and just when he holidays have come, i sprained an ankle. sigh. hopefully i can recover within the week 'cause my leg is really itching to run and play. :/